Thursday, May 22, 2014


Throw-Back Thursday: Six photos from age 12 to age 18.

In the first of these, at age 12 [1967, 7th grade, Dilley], my molestation had stopped but could recur at any point. I took steps that autumn to remove myself from his reach by siding with my father against my mother and demanding we take a job offer in Brazil. I was still wondering if I could have gotten pregnant. The dress I am wearing here represents a class shame I simply cannot write about.

The next one [9th grade, 1969], after our return from Brasil, was in Stoneburg where I experienced my first real freedom.

The third, at age 15 [10th grade, 1970, Stoneburg -- I made the dress I'm wearing], was when I was falling in love for the first time with a girl.

The fourth [age 16, junior year, 1971, Stoneburg] was after I'd started being mistreated by that first love (of course whom I chose turned out to be a sexual predator of children -- not long after this, she later raped my little brother).

In the fifth one [age 17, senior year, 1972, Stoneburg], I had just become lovers with someone new, five years my elder and very controlling.

In the sixth, my second year of college [1974, age 19, Denton], I was still emerging from a nervous breakdown brought on by poverty, shame, and being cheated on by my second lover with my first. Feminism was just arriving in my personal world to help me make sense of it all.

 These are hard memories and tough years. Recovery was a long way off and 2000 miles away.

No comments: