Saturday, December 22, 2012



Yesterday I got a package and as soon as I saw it was from Amanda, I began whispering "Please, please, let it be stollen!" And it was, a perfect golden loaf of it. I just had a toasted slice spread with cream cheese. Absolute solstice heaven.

The only time I've been to New England was several years ago to visit Amanda in Boston, via a ticket she sent me. It was a trip filled with adventure and golden memories, and I've written a lot about it. One perfect morning there was spent with me sitting at her kitchen table as she put together stollen, still in her adorable pajamas, while we talked some about Buffy, etc. I got a glimpse that day of her people, her childhood, and stollen became an item without which midwinter was not complete.

Our best friends, the ones we are meant to have, give us unlimited delight. My inner being alights when I think of Amanda. I never get enough of her mind, her worldview, her backstory. I am lucky to know her.

And the stollen is simply delicious proof of her love.


Thursday, December 20, 2012


It was a no-visitor morning, so I got to have a slow start to the day. Then Tammi and I experimented with a chewy sugar cookie recipe from America's Test Kitchen. I wanted something chewy and solid enough to stand uo to icing, and we substituted whole wheat flour for white, brown sugar for white, and used 1/3 less sugar. They could not have come out more perfect, bursting with flavour. Tomorrow I will mix multiple kinds of icing and decorate these.


Mama focused on family baking and crafts during the holidays, and that is what I have missed about adult celebrations of Christmas. She was unhurried and we laughed as we messed up in the learning process. Her Must Make list included divinity (both white and black fudge), lemon bars, Danish wedding cookies, candy-cane cookies (sprinkled with crushed peppermints we got to whack into dust with a hammer, and stained glass cookies. These latter were not the short-cut versions almost every recipe now has, but involved a double layer of dough with the top being an actual mosaic of colours cut from various hues and painstakingly fitted together by earnest little fingers. Sheer joy.

She was also a big fan of fruitcakes, but often simply waited for the one Aunt Sarah would send every year from that place in Corsicana. None of the rest of us could abide fruitcake, and the gingered candies were expensive to buy.



And now the Friday blast from Just Capshunz. Because starting the weekend snarky is a good idea. (Smooch.)


Wednesday, December 19, 2012


(Maggie and Scout, 30 November 2012)

Last night in the nether dregs I awakened and reached for Margot, but encountered only bedrail. I lay desolate for a few seconds, then whistled for Scout. No sound. I whistled again, and still no movement.

I said aloud into the dark, "Scoutie, I'm lonely, would you care to cuddle?" Within a minute she appeared on my belly, blinking in the cross-eyed way she does when she has just woke up. I held out my arms and she flopped herself onto my chest, wedging her head under my neck and starting a loud rumble. I thanked her and we dropped back off.

I tried resuming PT with Eddie today but half a set of the lower body exercises sent pain spikes into my urethra, so we backed off that and stuck to upper body work. The current Foley is not what we usually prefer, with a bulb that is a third the size Jessica recommends, so I may need to maintain status quo until around January 6th when I'm due for my next Foley change.


Tuesday, December 18, 2012


The apartment is redolent of lemons. Tammi and I are having a try at making home-made lemon curd. Will share the recipe if it works.

Jessica the nurse came and reassured me that the excessive sleepiness which has arrived is indeed a common side effect of certain antibiotics. I can simply sleep as much as I want and let my body recover from the infection. She is now off until the Thursday after Christmas, so I need to have no Foley problems until then. (Knock latex.)


Monday, December 17, 2012


Here's the weekly best of what I've gleaned from I Can Has Cheezburger efforts. There are some really creative folks out there. And one was me -- see if you can guess which one of these LOLCats I captioned myself.




My fundamentalist cousin's email today was another multi-forwarded thing crowded far over to the right margin by all the sending on (copy and paste is beyond their skillset, apparently). I confess I did not read it thoroughly, but the baseline document appeared to be a rant about how Target stores would not allow something Christmas-related to be advertised because the store had an official policy to only support LGBT and Muslim causes. They quoted some corporate newsletter allegedly stating this policy. Someone on the email list had taken the trouble to look it up on Snopes and refute this as a hoax, sending it back out to all the recipients of the previous email. The third response was a diatribe about how Snopes was run by queers and liberals, and nothing they said could be trusted, and therefore this proved the Target story must be true.

The whole thing reeks of such fear. They live in fear and misery.

And some part of me thinks her adding me to this list may be rationalized in her mind as trying to "save" me, but down at the deepest level, it's a cry for help. I am not going to help her, my priorities are elsewhere, but it's no problem for me to read the anguish and silently wish her well before going on to where I actually can be effective. And to note that someone else on that list is not drinking the koolaid.